Editorials

In Our View: Targeting Bullies

Monday, October 6 | 1:00 a.m.

Maybe you’ve heard the violence next door. Maybe you have a family member who has been in a violent relationship. Maybe you are one of 22 percent of American women who have experienced domestic violence.

Whoever you are, our community has opportunities to come together in October to support victims of domestic violence and learn what people can do to help prevent and stop it.

The Clark County YWCA is observing Domestic Violence Awareness month with a drum circle on Oct. 11 and an information night Oct. 29. The organization’s 15th annual benefit luncheon is Thursday at the Hilton. Visit www.ywcaclarkcounty.org for more information.

The YWCA says it is hard to get a handle on how many domestic violence incidents occur in Clark County. While local police agencies keep records of reported incidents, anyone familiar with domestic violence knows that this sort of personal tragedy goes largely unreported. What we do know is that if Clark County has numbers similar to the national ones, there are as many as 51,000 women here who have experienced domestic violence. And according to the Washington State Coalition Against Domestic Violence, there were 113 domestic violence-related deaths in the state between July 2004 and June 2006.

The YWCA is determined to help keep women from experiencing physical and verbal degradation. The local organization served 10,000 people last year, communications director Rose Hart said; 4,254 were helped by the SafeChoice Domestic Violence Program. SafeChoice offers victims and their families 60 days of safe housing and comprehensive services. The YWCA is looking for volunteers to help with programs. Call 696-0167 for more information about where your time or talents could be put to use. The organization’s next training session begins in January, so October is the perfect time to get connected.

The “Drum out the violence” event on Oct. 11 is an easy and interesting way to show support for people who have suffered from domestic violence. The drum circle is in collaboration with the Cowlitz Tribe. An elder will be on hand to read a proclamation against domestic violence and give a brief talk. Audience members will be invited to speak about domestic violence.

The Cowlitz and YWCA are a good fit. Hart says statistics show that 30.7 percent of Native American women have experienced domestic violence. That’s higher than the general population.

The YWCA and the tribe started working together on a sexual assault program for the tribe that was culturally appropriate and have a collaborative working relationship.

The event on the 29th is perfect for anyone who has wondered what to do for a friend or family member in need. The presentation is titled “Why does she stay? How can I help?”

Help drum out the violence or learn more at the annual benefit or presentation.
Domestic violence victims and potential victims need all of us to be as aware of the problem.

by phil jones : 10/6/08 8:22am - Report Abuse

The YWCA has just sold in favor of gambling. The only reason the Cowlitz are involved is to build a concensus in the community for thier casino.

by citizen 2008 : 10/6/08 10:24am - Report Abuse

I celebrate any community efforts to reduce the impact of these domestic abusers. Anything that will help the survivors of this insidious and widespread domestic bullying is welcome. This is certainly one of the most profound social problems of our time... and it happens right where people expect to feel the safest... behind closed doors, in their own homes, and the perpetrators are the people who we should be able to rely on, not be afraid of. Congratulations to the YWCA for their tireless work, usually un-paid, on behalf of the survivors of domestic abuse. And hats off to the Cowlitz and to any other volunteers who put their energies behind trying to reduce the harm of this very hurtful behavior.

by Ernest Finch : 10/6/08 11:15am - Report Abuse

"Bill Clinton," John Edwards, Oingo Boingo, Blind Observer, et. al. ad nauseum:<p>
It is obvious you have run out of ammunition and have resorted to name-calling. I would compare you to someone who is still stuck in high school, but it is obvious you never got that far, especially considering you cannot stick to the subject of the article.
<p>
You have never made a valid point before, so why are you wasting everyone's time proving you are incapable of such a feat?

by dee little : 10/6/08 12:28pm - Report Abuse

The Cowlitz can um, "keep" their drum circle.

I, for one, will never again be the target of an abuser. And I have a 9MM, locked and loaded, in my purse, to insure that.

by Always Right : 10/6/08 7:37pm - Report Abuse

I know of a person(s) who could/would help themselves by taking this article seriously...bendy bender and ernest finch. I have found they engage in sophomoric assumtions and name calling on these boards. That is abuse!!

by Penny Schinke : 10/7/08 11:02pm - Report Abuse

Having grown up in a home where drunken abuse of my mother was pretty regular, I can tell you that "drumming" and proclamations don't do a whole lot to help, because the people who really need to hear that stuff won't be able to leave their homes and be at a gathering like that. Alanon helped my mother eventually. The biggest weapon that the abuser uses is the destruction of his victim's self esteem. She's told that she's too stupid, too this, too that, and that she's so bad at housekeeping, child rearing, dressing, taking care of herself...so he has to keep her pretty much under his thumb. That she has done something in her past or present that will cause her to lose her children to him...she's just such a bad person...no one will stand up for her or with her. Proclamations and drumbeats sound like window dressing to me. Every one needs to know basic facts, so that when a neighbor/co-worker/church member says, after you've seen too many black eyes on her face, "He says he'll get the kids because I didn't finish school/I don't have a job/I have no place to go", YOU can tell her "Call...." and give her that women's shelter/safe house phone number, and a way to get there.

But, please, please, make her promise to keep the phone number a secret/hidden...men have done sometimes fatal things to women who have "almost" found escape.

Yeah, I'm wary of organizations and groups that are "do gooders" and make a show of it.

by Penny Schinke : 10/7/08 11:05pm - Report Abuse

BTW...control the alcohol consumption and/or drug taking and you'll get closer to controlling the abuse...

by dee little : 10/9/08 10:32am - Report Abuse

"But, please, please, make her promise to keep the phone number a secret/hidden...men have done sometimes fatal things to women who have "almost" found escape."

That's why I took the kids & stayed at my sister's house until he was gone.

by Penny Schinke : 10/9/08 11:17pm - Report Abuse

Dee....I'm sure that you know, as I do, that this drum/proclamation isn't going to get to the women who really need it...they'll be at home...living in fear.