Pollard farewell full of roasts, toasts

Looking amazingly like Vancouver businessman and philanthropist Ed Lynch, the “homeless man” ambled into the ballroom of the Hilton Vancouver Washington, pushing a grocery cart with a furry ball inside. As he passed a woman who seemed to be a dead ringer for recently retired council member Pat Jollota, a plaintive call issued from her lips: “Kitty, kitty, kitty.”

Ignoring her, the faux ragamuffin shuffled his cart toward former mayor Royce Pollard, and began to taunt him with insults about the shambles Esther Short Park had become.

A few minutes later, a man dressed as an Army Ranger with war paint on his face, strode into the room bellowing ”HOOAH!” That’s a military expression for pride, high morale and confidence — or anything else.

He said he was representing himself, and not Clark College president Bob Knight.

Then he engaged the 315 people in the ballroom in a marching cadence: “I don’t know, but I hear rumors; Mayor Pollard wears bloomers. I don’t know, but I’ve been told Mayor Pollard is good as gold.” The “Ranger” also recited an “Ode to Royce Pollard,” ending, ”So Royce, let me say, as a very dear friend, your legacy in Vancouver will never come to an end.”

That was the basic format for the evening Feb.17, one of the most lively and warm farewells seen recently in Vancouver. Heralded as “A Roast, Toast & Boast Gala,” it followed a consistent format: First the zinger; then the toast.

Ginger Metcalf, executive director of Identity Clark County, hatched the idea, and began gathering volunteers the first week of December. “We wanted people to have fun. We wanted it to be lively, and we put together the program and said, let her rip.”

Lacking details, Pollard, she said, was skeptical. “I don’t want a funeral,” he declared. It was anything but. Masters of ceremony Elson Strahan, Historic Trust, and Kim Capeloto, Vancouver Chamber, kept the pace brisk, and so did the speakers.

Former Vancouver city economic development director Steve Burdick recalled his first contact with Pollard, then commander of the Vancouver Barracks. “Pollard phoned me, and said there were two archaeologists digging on both sides of a driveway in the Barracks, and if I didn’t get them out in 20 minutes, he’d have them shot.”

Mark Brown, lobbyist for the city, and the evening’s auctioneer, recalled when Mayor Pollard decided he “didn’t want that … communist in my city,” referring to Russian Premier Vladimir Putin, whom the city had been trying to woo as Marshall lecturer. Brown said a Russian envoy who heard the mayor predicted no future for Pollard as a career diplomat.

Auctioning Pollard memorabilia, which netted $3,000 for the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program, Brown sold a book entitled “Old Forts,” which was mistakenly touted as a Pollard profile.

Praise and tribute easily overwhelmed the zingers. There were recorded video compliments from U.S. Sen. Patty Murray and U.S. Rep. Brian Baird. Lynch, the “bum” from Esther Short, said, “Royce made things happen.” “First Mike,” the Governor’s husband, enthused, “what a great evening,” and praised Pollard for extraordinary service as mayor. John Lee, director of the state Department of Veterans ‘ Affairs, complimented Pollard for high dedication to military “men and women who serve this country, and their families.”

Lt. Gov. Brad Owen, a frequent Vancouver visitor, said, “I have never seen a man (in this state) so dedicated to his city as Royce Pollard.” Owen’s wife, Linda, presented a hand-crafted blanket to Pollard.

Ed and Will, sons of Royce and Margaret Pollard, thanked their father for finding the Vancouver home, and his grandchildren shouted, “we love you grandpa.” The former mayor was given a check to cover a trip for him and Margaret, and the ad hoc “Roycettes,” women from the audience, sang a special rendition of a Willie Nelson song.

Pollard’s “rebuttal,” in part: “Thank you. I love you all.” Reflecting on the evening, he said: “That’s the nicest thing anybody’s ever done for me.”