That must be because "a world-renowned team of experts in biomechanics and physiology from six universities" has determined that Pistorius' prostheses don't give him an unfair advantage (click here). To me, "a world-renowned team of experts in biomechanics and physiology from six universities" sounds like the kind of credentials you would hear on a really bad infomercial, like for something that can cure ED and halitosis all at once.

On the other hand, it seems as though we spend an awful lot of time in this world trying to tell people they can't do something. Like here (click here). So if a world-renowned team of experts in biomechanics and physiology say it's OK, that's good enough for me.

Any sane person would agree that the Blazers have retired too many numbers. Lloyd Neal? Larry Steele? Dave Twardzik? Fine players all, but the Blazers diminish what accomplishments the franchise has had by retiring such undistinguished jerseys. Anyway, Golliver's formula spits out Maurice Lucas, Clyde Drexler and Bill Walton as the no-brainers for having their numbers retired, with Geoff Petrie and Terry Porter as strong candidates.

I would say stop at Lucas, Drexler and Walton and call it good for now. But that's just me.

Let's compare the Blazers to the Cavaliers, who entered the league at the same time and have a much less distinguished legacy. The Cavs have retired six numbers; the Blazers have honored eight players, an owner and a coach. On the other hand, the Golden State Warriors, who have been around for 60 years and have won three championships, have retired five numbers; the Atlanta Hawks have been around 60 years and have honored three players, plus another who died young (click here for list of all retired NBA numbers).

He then took off his shoe and pounded the podium, saying, "We will bury you!"

Just kidding about that last part, but there was more to come from the Self-Important One. As if a lack of objectivity weren't enough to doom the NFL to eternal damnation, Specter then played the ... wait for it ... wait for it ... the think-of-the-children card! Yes, yes, that dastardly Bill Belichick is a threat to your kids! Seriously! Specter actually said this! I'm so worked up that I can't stop exclamating!

This is a real quote from a real U.S. senator, talking about a football game: "They are enormous role models for everybody. If you can cheat in the NFL, you can cheat in college, you can cheat in high school, you can cheat on your grade-school math test. There's no limit as to what you can do."

Yes, because Bill Belichick taped some football plays, THERE'S NO LIMIT AS TO WHAT YOU CAN DO. My fourth-grade daughter is going to cheat on a math test, and it's going to be Bill Belichick's fault. And I won't even be able to say that Arlen Specter didn't warn me ahead of time!

But guess what: Belichick and the Patriots have already paid a hefty price for Spygate. They paid a total of $750,000 in fines and lost a first-round draft pick. That wasn't enough for Specter, as he bellowed, "I am the Mighty Prometheus! Bring me the finest meats and cheeses and the head of the great warrior Belichick!"

OK, we made that one up. But admit it: For a second there, you kind of believed it.

>>>Jim Moore of the Post-Intelligencer writes about staff cuts at Seattle sports-radio station KJR (click here). Consider it a warning to our now-saturated sports radio market.

>>>LeBron James is barely shooting his weight against Boston, but here's one he made (click here).

>>>LeBron talks back to mom (click here). Will soon determine whether Lifebuoy tastes better than Dove.

>>>Boat sails 100 feet. Through the air. And lands in a greenside bunker (click here).