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Clark County’s Storm City Roller Girls host daylong tourney

By Scott Hewitt, Columbian staff writer
Published: February 16, 2018, 6:04am
10 Photos
The Storm City Roller Girls discuss strategy before a practice session in Hazel Dell in 2017. The team is hosting a daylong tournament Saturday at the Clark County Event Center at the Fairgrounds. Five out-of-town teams will be participating.
The Storm City Roller Girls discuss strategy before a practice session in Hazel Dell in 2017. The team is hosting a daylong tournament Saturday at the Clark County Event Center at the Fairgrounds. Five out-of-town teams will be participating. Photo Gallery

You’ve probably heard about this shambling guy named Lebowski, who insists on being called “The Dude.” He’s the star of an extremely offbeat, extremely male Coen Brothers comedy called “The Big Lebowski.”

But all the macho dudes participating in “The Big LeBoutSki” at the Clark County Event Center on Saturday are chicks. And they’re chicks who can probably take you down if you call them “Dude” with anything but admiration.

The Big LeBoutSki is a daylong extravaganza of roller derby, a fast-moving, fast-growing contact sport that has been building strong muscles and thick hides among women from every walk of life, all around the world, for the past few decades.

The local host team is Clark County’s own Storm City Roller Girls; visiting for the day will be the Roller Betties (of Bellingham), the Rodeo City Rollergirls (of Ellensburg), the Northwest Derby Company (of Bremerton) and the Gorge Roller Girls (of The Dalles, Ore.) Officially sanctioned, bracketed bouts between these visitors are scheduled for 11 a.m. and 1, 5 and 7 p.m.; an exhibition bout between your local host and the visiting Femme Fianna (of Tacoma) is set for 3 p.m. That’s a heck of a lot of derby.

If You Go

• What: The Big LeBoutSki, a whole day of roller derby bouts.

 When: Doors open at 10 a.m. Saturday. 11 a.m., Rodeo City vs. Roller Betties. 1 p.m., Northwest Derby Company vs. Gorge Roller Girls. 3 p.m., Femme Fianna vs. Storm City. 5 p.m., 3rd-4th place bout. 7 p.m., 1st-2nd place bout.

 Where: Clark County Event Center at the Fairgrounds, 17402 N.E. Delfel Road, Ridgefield.

• Cost: $25. Parking $6 per vehicle.

• Information: www.stormcityrollergirls.com.

Players do get hurt in the rolling rough-and-tumble, but nobody lets that faze them.

“It’s competitive and you’re trying to win and you do rough each other up — but then you have beers afterwards and laugh about it,” a Storm City girl named Dirty Ann Rotten told The Columbian last year.

Named what? In the tough-yet-good-humored culture of women’s roller derby, all players assume nicknames — like The Dude — that are both slightly silly and definitely badass. (When The Columbian asked for their real names, they said they’d prefer to be known by the mean-girl ones.) In addition to Rotten, this year’s roster of Storm City Roller Girls includes characters like Moxxi Maelstrom, Mimi Mayhem, Kicky Longstocking and MC Slammer.

“What attracted me was all these strong women who wouldn’t normally meet, if it wasn’t for this,” said Rotten. “We are strong and confident and we support each other.” As a child, she said, she excelled at the extremely non-macho sport of figure skating and was surprised to discover, later in life, that skills like fancy footwork, speed and agility transferred naturally to roller derby.

How does roller derby work? Each team fields five players who roll counterclockwise around a flat track. Each team has one jammer and four blockers. The jammer’s job is to speed ahead and score points by lapping members of the opposing team; blockers try to slow the rival team’s jammer — via hip checks, screens and other body-to-body tactics — while speeding their own jammer along.

That’s a simplified explanation. “The rule book is thick and super-intricate,” Troublemaker said. “It can take a year of practice to know what you’re doing.”

There’s a popular saying about roller derby’s blend of mental and physical challenge, she added: It’s like playing speed chess while someone throws bricks at you.

Weddings too

By the way, here’s a funny mash-up of cultures. Simultaneously underway on Saturday in neighboring space at the Clark County Event Center at the Fairgrounds will be the Clark County Wedding Expo, an extravaganza of planners and vendors. That ticket price is $10, but your ticket to The Big LeBoutSki also buys you free admission into the Wedding Expo — an event that’s about as girly as it gets.

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