New Preamble to the Constitution under President Trump:
“We the people of the United States, in order to form a more dysfunctional Union, circumvent justice, increase conflict through name-calling, ensure power over peaceful demonstrators with tear gas and rubber bullets, promote more and more hydroxychloroquine for everyone, and to secure the blessings of liberty for the president not to wear his N95 mask, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.”
