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News / Opinion / Columns

Camden: State behind on vaccine freebies

By Jim Camden
Published: May 12, 2021, 6:01am

As a person who went through more than a month in early 2021 trying to get an appointment anywhere within 30 miles for a COVID vaccination, I confess to scratching my head at reports there is currently more vaccine than people willing to sit down and roll up their sleeves.

Some states now offer incentives, because apparently it’s not enough for some people to get a free shot — for a much reduced chance of getting a serious disease and a miniscule chance of dying from it if you do contract it. One state is offering $100 savings bonds to persons 35 and under who get shots, and another is offering a free beer.

Washington has yet to offer any such incentive to boost its vaccination rate. Gov. Jay Inslee did have a few carrots in a recent set of rules, such as allowing outside venues like sports stadiums to increase capacity for vaccinated fans in sections specifically designed for them. Regular readers might recall that Spin Control suggested something similar a few weeks ago, although we’d be the first to admit the governor’s staff likely formulated the plan on their own and didn’t call for a consultation.

If they had, we’d predict — based on emails and phone calls about the column — a response like the one they got from Rep. Jim Walsh, an Aberdeen Republican, who called such a plan “an unconstitutional, illegal, and immoral system of state-imposed segregation.”

Although most segregation deals with things a person can’t change, like race, religion or ethnicity, Walsh or other opponents are free to question any perceived violation of the constitutional or biblical strictures. In the meantime, however, perhaps a better way to coax shots into arms would be for businesses to offer a variation of the ever popular Buy One, Get One offers. It could be labeled Get One, Get One — GOGO.

The Spokane Indians might boost attendance by offering a free ticket to a game in August when a fan presents proof of vaccination when buying a ticket for a game in May. Such a GOGO is admittedly a risk because by August the team may be red hot and seats might be in demand. Then again, the Indians might be mired in the cellar and the team and its vendors would benefit from butts in the seats.

If requiring vaccinations to be on campus and setting up a vaxx-only section of the stands in Martin Stadium aren’t enough to get 100 percent of Washington State University students their shots, perhaps a coupon for a free bottle opener that plays the Cougar fight song would seal the deal. For adult fans, the GOGO could be putting the vaxx section between the 40-yard lines, and the unvaxx section in the end zones.

In some states with recreational marijuana laws, vaxx recipients are being offered a free joint or a free edible. Washington doesn’t allow such giveaways, but pot shops might offer a box of Funyuns to patrons who are reluctant to get a shot or just keep forgetting to do it.

Budweiser has a drawing for a free round of Bud, which has a nice working-class appeal to folks of a certain age. But for a broader Northwest sort of reach, the Spokane Hospitality Coalition could offer the newly vaccinated coupons for a free drink. They could make it flexible enough to allow for a pint of piney IPA for the persnickety beer drinker, a glass of chilled crisp rosé for a mom escaping the kids for a few hours or a hard seltzer for the millennials and Gen Zers.

Early in the vaccination process, Krispy Kreme announced it would give a free doughnut to any person with proof of vaccination. The shops aren’t keeping track, so in theory a person who lives near such a shop could stop by every day for a free doughnut for the next year, which raises the prospect of virus antibodies coursing through ever-thickening arteries.

For those who love the Second Amendment, one of the gun rights groups could offer a ticket to a raffle for an AR-15 to anyone getting the shot. Or maybe a coupon for a clip of ammunition of choice at their favorite shooting range.

Shots for a shot. It has kind of a nice ring.

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