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‘I will not rest’: 2 years after her son’s murder, KC mom still searches for answers

By Jenna Thompson, The Kansas City Star
Published: April 9, 2023, 6:00am
2 Photos
Sherry Paige holds a photo of her son on March 30, 2023, in Kansas City. Paige commissioned a billboard hoping to seek justice for the death of her son, Shawndele Lyle Gray, who was found shot inside his vehicle two years ago.
Sherry Paige holds a photo of her son on March 30, 2023, in Kansas City. Paige commissioned a billboard hoping to seek justice for the death of her son, Shawndele Lyle Gray, who was found shot inside his vehicle two years ago. (Emily Curiel/The Kansas City Star/TNS) Photo Gallery

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — When Sherry Paige’s son walks into a room, she catches herself searching for someone else. She scans the room hoping his identical twin, Shawndele Gray, will come trailing in behind.

Paige said where one once was, the other could be found somewhere nearby. Shawndele and Shawntele Gray were indistinguishable even to some close family members, swapping clothes to look even more alike.

“Too much,” they called the energetic Shawndele Gray.

Shawntele Gray’s nickname matches, like everything else about the pair. He’s known as “too real.”

Paige waits, but Shawndele Gray doesn’t come through the door. Her grief comes flooding back as she’s reminded that she hasn’t seen her son in two-and-a-half years, since before he was shot and killed.

At night, she struggles to fall asleep. She shuts her eyes only to toss and turn in her bed, knowing the person who killed her son is likely resting soundly in his.

“Is there something else I should be doing?” she asks herself as her mind races into the early morning hours. Sometimes she goes days without sleep.

For the past two years, Paige has been handing out fliers, calling detectives and working to keep Shawndele Gray’s name fresh in the community’s mind. On papers she hands out, a photo of him sits under the words, “Who murdered me?”

Now, a billboard towers over 85th Street and Troost Avenue, urging drivers who might know something to contact police. Paige hopes the sign will bring about the tip that finally brings closure to her son’s case.

Though no arrests have been made in the murder of her son, Paige said she hasn’t lost faith. Nothing can bring him back, but she hopes the person who shot and killed her son will one day, soon, have to answer for his crimes.

“I will not rest until I get justice,” she said.

The shooting

Just after midnight on Sept. 3, 2020, Gray was shot and killed inside a vehicle.

In previous statement from the Kansas City Police Department, a spokeswoman said the vehicle was found at U.S. 71/Bruce R. Watkins Drive and the on-ramp of 75th Street. Shawndele Gray was sitting inside his dark blue 2002 Nissan Maxima Sudan when he was killed.

Paige said her son was actually shot at the corner of 58th Street and Wabash Avenue, but then drove to the spot where he was found.

According to Sgt. Jake Becchina, a spokesman with the KCPD, no persons of interest have been identified in the case.

‘Ripped out of my heart’

Shawndele Gray’s family says he had many virtues, but first and foremost he loved his family.

He cried the day his twin got married, said his sister-in-law, Keona Gray. He joyfully stood beside his brother at the altar as his best man when the two said “I do.”

Both twins would go on to have sets of children around the same age, with Shawndele Gray leaving behind six kids in his death.

Shawndele Gray was an adoring uncle, attending his nieces’ and nephews’ activities and bringing his own children around for play dates.

Each time one of the children’s birthdays passes, Paige feels her son’s absence even more deeply.

“It just felt like he was ripped out of my heart or something,” she said. “I can’t explain it. It’s horrible.”

Keona Gray said her brother-in-law was always “the life of the party,” but he had as much of a knack for creativity and music as he did socialization.

The brothers both loved to draw, paint and rap. Before his death, Shawndele and Shawntele Gray had planned to start a T-shirt business together.

Growing up, the twins were weekly attendees of their home church, sitting in Sunday school to hear their teacher and longtime family friend the Rev. Flawn Barber preach.

The brothers would switch seats to try to confuse Barber, but she said she could always tell them apart — Shawndele Gray had an unmistakable grin.

“He was always respectful when I saw him,” she said. “He would always give me that infectious smile.”

His aunts, Mary Williams and Shirley Gregory, remember his gentle spirit and kindness. At holiday get-togethers, he was the one supplying the jokes and laughter.

“We’re saddened every day,” Williams said. “Everything reminds me of him.”

When Shawndele and Shawntele would get visits from their cousin in Chicago, Victor Washington, their time was filled with games of pick-up basketball, cards and trying different local restaurants.

It’s hard for him to fathom that they’ll never be able to sit across from each other again.

“It’s like you’re standing still almost,” he said. “You can’t believe this has happened.”

Waiting for an arrest

Standing under the billboard, Paige and her sister, Sharon Fisher, wear blue scarves, tees and jackets. The outfits pay tribute to Shawndele Gray. Blue was his favorite color.

The sign announces a $25,000 reward to the cars zipping past. Paige has on a cap much like one her son would wear. The back of her shirt, surrounded by a photo of Shawndele Gray, is printed with the words “Mama’s boy.”

The night police told Fisher her nephew had died, she didn’t believe them.

“Let me hear his voice,” she thought, picking up the phone to confirm the mistake. But he didn’t answer.

Fisher drove over to see Paige. “You’re lying,” she said when she was told what had happened.

Shawndele Gray was buried in a Kansas City cemetery, his headstone adorned with a cross, paint palette, microphone and music note. His twin nickname is engraved, with his mother’s future plot next to him.

Some days, Shawndele Gray’s family wonders when there will be an arrest in the case. They pray and search for answers, but they’re going on three years without Shawndele Gray’s killer being caught.

“I’m hopeful,” Fisher said. “I’m just wondering what’s taking so long.”

Every day, Paige hopes she’ll get the call announcing the person who took her son away has been apprehended.

She wants justice.

“More than Christ hates sin,” Paige said.

Those with information about Shawndele Gray’s death are asked to call homicide detectives at 816-234-5043 or the TIPS Hotline at 816-474-TIPS (8477). A reward of up to $25,000 is being offered for information leading to an arrest.

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