Letter: Share boom and bang with officials

Now that my ears have stopped ringing, and I can hear myself think, let’s talk about the combat zone — I mean Vancouver, around the Fourth of July. OK, boys and girls, here is the plan.

1. Buy up and store all of the heavy concussion and loud fireworks we can, by the first of July 2012.

2. We form up platoons and at pre-designated locations, meet about noon on the 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th, be prepared to work until well after midnight.

3. Locations: In front of City Hall, daytime and evenings while council meetings are in session; in the street in front of the Vancouver mayor’s residence; groups around each of the homes of the city manager and all council members and decision-makers, if there are any.

Each member with loud concussion-style fireworks will be directed to seek out spots close to pets and older folks. And we will charge officials to stay home and enjoy the endless noise and debris falling on their roofs, cars, and their yards filling with mounds of discarded trash.

We have our orders, make ready.

Kenneth F. Smith

Vancouver